Wordless Wednesday: June 27th, 2012 MOVING DAY!

Want a Hug?

It is hard to change the world. When everything you know about parenting and discipline is disconnecting and punitive, it seems especially difficult to want to do things differently. How do you deal with "bad" behavior, without punishing your child? How do you teach what you ave never learned? I have three ideas that were shared with me that I do my best to remember when interacting with my children.


Does It REALLY Matter? To Who?
Before reacting to a behavior, first ask yourself if it matters. Jumping on the furniture? Touching every cereal box in the aisle? Throwing all the bedding on the floor? Hitting other children? I find that often, actions not having a direct effect on other people are often disallowed just because we are used to saying "no" to that action. Often we fear what other people are thinking about our children's behavior or how they are judging our parenting and react out of fear of judgment. So asking myself what really matters to me and my child is important in picking my battles, and deciding what kind of reaction would be best.

They Are HAVING a Problem, Not BEING a Problem
When things are getting out of hand, and children are acting out it might be good to remember that our children are NOT out to get us. They don't behave in that way just to test us or to be at odds with us. Children want to be connected to us, but might not always know how to communicate it or gain that connection.


Children Are People Too
Say your child just threw their dinner plate on the floor, how would you react? Now, imagine it was your partner or best friend: how is the reaction different? This is the pinnacle of my reason for wanting to be a gentle parent. Children are people, and they deserve the same respect we do. These are not tactics we tolerate in the adult world, it makes little sense to use them on our children.

All that said: I have been at this parenting gig for almost 5 years. I am not awesome at this stuff. I even had a moment WHILE WRITING THIS that I imagined drop kicking my kiddo upon discovering the poopy finger paint done in the quiet moment I stole to add a bit to this post. Before finding people with similar ideals when my son was almost 6 months, I never knew people who wanted to use gentle discipline. I have to work each and every time something comes up to react in a way I can be proud of. I don't often succeed. The point is that I keep trying. And when all the techniques fail and I have no more tricks to try I know that just getting down on their level and asking for a hug will do us both a world of good.

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Please join us all week, June 25-June30, 2012, as we explore the world of gentle, effective parenting. We have new posts each day by talented authors providing us with insight into why gentle parenting is worth your time and how to implement it on a daily basis. Check out all the carnival posts over on ParentingGently.com We are also giving away several parenting book and other goodies from our sponsors this week. Please stop by and enter to win! This year's beautiful motherhood artwork is by Patchwork Family Art. Visit the store to see all her work.

Monday, June 25

Are you considering Gentle Discipline and don't know where to start?  Not surprising giving how the media talks about helicopter and permissive parenting.  If you like the idea of gentle parenting but don't know where to start then today's posts are for you!

	Want a Hug? by Jennifer at True Confessions of a Real Mommy
	10 Principles of Unconditional Parenting by Amy from Presence Parenting writing for Natural Parents Network
	Spare the Rod? Does the Bible Promote Spanking? by Paige at Parenting Gently
	Biblical Instructions for Discipline: How Should a Christian Parent? by Dulce de leche
	Looking for a Better Way by Practical OH Mommy Tuesday, June 26 Maybe you've read posts like yesterdays and you are intellectually convinced that this gentle parenting thing sounds great.  Now what?  Today's posts expand on the philosophy of gentle parenting as our authors break it down. When Empathy Doesn't "Work" by Dr. Laura Markham   Kids Are People Too - and how remembering that can make life so much easier by Momma on a Mission   So You're Thinking of Trying a Different Way? by Practical OH Mommy   Life Isn't One Size Fits All by Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children   To Me, Gentle Parenting Means... by A Teachable Mom Wednesday, June 27  Now that you have a great basis for the principles of gentle parenting let's look at one of the trickier parts of implementation.  Punishment.  Consequences.  Regardless of how mainstream parents talk about it this is the "big scary" thing that many parents worry will make their parenting permissive.  Today's authors talk about this important issue. We Don't Do Discipline by Tat at Mum in Search   The Fine Art of Natural Consequences and Logical Consequences by Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama   Save Time Outs for the Soccer Field by Practical OH MOmmy   Gentle Discipline Basics: Teaching Skills by The HIppie Housewife

Thursday, June 28

Today's authors look at some specific situations that many parents face and give us a gentle approach to resolution.

	Parenting Gently Through the Preschool Phase by Attached Moms
	The Hardest Part of Gentle Discipline Is... by Practical OH Mommy
	Toddler Discipline and Balancing Needs by The Natural Parenting Mentors at Natural Parents Network
	With Spit on My Face and Love in My Heart by MomeeeZen
	Understanding and Responding to Preschooler Spitting

Can You Spare $1 To Help Baby Sean?

On June 10th 2012, Baby Sean was born. He is truly a miracle baby and both he and his family need our help. A fellow blogger with the Natural Parents Network shared Baby Sean’s incredible story with us and asked if we could reach out to our friends and fans. Jennifer of Hybrid Rasta Mama is hoping to raise $1,000 over the next several days to help both baby Sean and his family as they face the lofty challenges in front of them. Please take a moment and read a little about Baby Sean’s journey and needs as shared by Jennifer. From 2001 until June 2011, I was fortunate enough to have five of the most caring, uplifting, generous and supportive people caring for my grandmother who suffered from dementia. This family literally fell into our lives and because of their selflessness, my grandmother lived 94 wonderful years. Without the care and support she received, I doubt that my daughter would have had the opportunity to spend two years with a great-grandmother who loved her, even when she did not have a clue who she was. Caroline was my grandmother’s main caretaker but her entire family (husband Tony and their three young children) did everything that my family could not. They bathed her, they cleaned up her bathroom accidents, they fed her nourishing foods, they told her stories, they took her to concerts, they took her camping, they took her to family events, and the list goes on. They lived with her 24 hours per day, 7 days per week with no time off. They embraced her and together, they become an expanded family. After my grandmother passed away in June 2011, I not only mourned her death but I mourned the loss of my extended family. Although I knew we would keep in touch, it would still be different. Fast forward to the end of May 2012. Caroline had been experiencing a headache that defied words. She decided to go to the hospital, knowing that something serious was going on. A short while after her arrival, she learned that she was 26 weeks pregnant and in a major health crisis. That headache was the result of preeclampsia and gestational diabetes. Both Caroline and her unborn baby were in serious trouble. Caroline was put on hospital bed rest where a fabulous team of doctors and nurses did all they could to keep Caroline’s baby where he should be…in his warm, watery womb. Unfortunately, Caroline’s placenta was too thick, her baby was not getting nourishment, and his life was in danger. After his heart kept stopping, Caroline underwent an emergency C-section to save both her baby’s life as well as hers.   15 days after walking into the hospital for a headache, Caroline gave birth to a 1 pound 10 ounce baby boy she and her husband named Sean Feleti Jeremiah Mokofisi.

Baby Sean is a miracle. He is a fighter. And he has a long road ahead of him. However, Baby Sean is already breathing well on his own, a miracle and something pretty rare for a baby only 28 weeks gestational age. He has had some significant health challenges since his birth but has fought through them with the help of a wonderful and talented team of doctors. Baby Sean is not able to be held or breastfeed but Caroline is pumping milk and the hospital has been very supportive of her through this. They are also open to supplementing with donor milk, knowing how crucial breastmilk is to a premature baby. Caroline has had some health challenges as she recovers from not only the C-section but the preeclampsia and gestational diabetes. However, she is expected to be released from the hospital soon. Baby Sean is not so fortunate. His stay will be quite lengthy.

This is where YOU come in.

Caroline and her family were already at a financial disadvantage before this incredible journey began. They work hard, they are generous people – giving to those even less fortunate than they are. They give everything they have to care for their children and give them the best life possible. But the economic cards have been stacked against them and the financial impact of such a lengthy and complex hospital stay for both Caroline and Baby Sean will be devastating to them. Once Caroline is released from the hospital, she will have to travel 45 minutes each direction to see her baby daily. The cost of gasoline is going to make this near impossible. On top of that, Caroline needs to begin preparing for Baby Sean’s arrival home and literally does not have the resources to purchase the most basic of baby supplies let alone some of the special supplies a premature baby with Sean’s health needs might require. Today we are reaching out to you. Could you donate $1 – just ONE DOLLAR – to help Baby Sean? Your donation will go towards clothes, cloth diapers, a car seat, and other premature baby essentials. In addition, it will help this beautiful family make the daily trip to bond with and bring breastmilk to their precious son. If you aren’t able to donate, perhaps you know someone who could. In lieu of a donation, we are asking for help in spreading the word. We know that in these tough economic times, it is difficult to know when to give and what cause deserves our hard earned dollar. This baby needs our help now! Imagine if this was your baby and all you needed was a little financial cushion so you could start your baby’s life out right? Caroline, Tony, their entire family and Baby Sean are already deeply grateful, humbled, and moved to tears by the mere fact that we are raising funds to assist them in their greatest hour of need. So thank you for your help. It literally will make a world of difference in this family and child’s lives.

HOW TO HELP

To donate to the Help Baby Sean fun, please click the DONATE button below. You will be taken to Paypal where you can donate even if you do not have a Paypal account.

If you prefer, you can purchase a copy of Jennifer’s eBook, Coconut Oil For Your Skin, for $9.95. This increased price will be in effect June 20th and 21st and all sales from those days will go directly to the Help Baby Sean fund. Click the BUY IT NOW coconut below to purchase the eBook.

Together, we WILL be able to help Baby Sean and his family get off to the best start possible. Again, thank you and many, many blessings for your generosity!